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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26645635">STARLIGHT</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamskym/pseuds/iamskym'>iamskym</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Stray Kids (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Timelines, Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, Same name but diff characters, Slow Build, Sort of adventure, attempt at mystery, changlix boyfriends, could be very confusing, idk how to write at all, idk how to write fanfic, might be very boring to read but pls pls give it a chance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:27:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>14,920</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26645635</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamskym/pseuds/iamskym</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“My great uncle once told me about how starlights travel lightyears away to reach us. The farther they are, the least you see them by the naked eyes. There are billion stars in the universe. Some shine brightly in the night sky but some don't. It could be that their light is still traveling. Or they're too far away that their light will never reach us. So every night, I stargaze for those stars that I will never see because I know, somewhere in this vast space, they are also shining brightly. And I somehow want them to know that. As for these stars we see tonight, they hold memories we will never know. They traveled light-years away. Imagine their stories. These pictures,” Seungmin glances at the photos in his hand. “They took 50 years to reach us. What could be its tale?”</p><p> </p><p>Or: Hyunjin saw an exhibit of a 50-year-old photograph collection and he's in each one of them or someone who looked exactly like him. It's a small detail but a sense of dejavu confirmed him as if he remember exactly when and where it happened</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hwang Hyunjin &amp; Kim Seungmin, Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. monochrome</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I hope someone read this.</p><p> </p><p>Please read it!</p><p> </p><p>(っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The closest star to Earth is the sun. Its light reaches the planet in just a span of 8 minutes and 20 seconds. It doesn’t matter though. The sun reaches us through sunrise— a ball of orange rising from the horizon, another day begins.</p><p> </p><p>It is a source of energy for most living beings. For us, to animals, to plants, and probably to most other organisms with scientific names complicated to pronounce. However, for Hyunjin it is a source of exhaustion. He thumbs the collar of his white shirt to fan himself, if ever that is of any help at all which no doubt it isn't.</p><p> </p><p>Beads of sweat resume to form on his forehead, trickling down his eyes. He blinks at how it stings. He wipes it with the back of his hand.</p><p> </p><p>The location on his phone shows he is almost there. He continues his walk. A church bell rings from a distance. A family passes by him with a kid whining about the heat, her dad wiping the sweat from her neck. Finally, after crossing a street, he spots the place inscribed in the most minimalist font he can recall. </p><p> </p><p>Clé Gallery is an exhibit facility set up in the heart of the city. A two-story modern building with architecture fit for its purpose. Fine lines and tinted glass stretches across the wall of the 2nd floor. Fields of grass surround the vicinity. Hyunjin frowns upon seeing the parking lot empty. “Is it close?”</p><p> </p><p>A week ago, his professor in Humanities left them a task and that is to visit a gallery or museum and write a paper about their discoveries and realizations towards the ‘life of arts’. He had seen his classmates roll their eyes upon hearing that. He, on the other hand, was low-key excited since he loves art. Right then, he was eagerly looking forward to seeing inspirations he can acquire to improve his photography ideas. It must be fate, he thinks, that his friend’s mom is a curator offering him the opportunity for free sightseeing. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin practically sprints across the open space until he reaches the door entrance craving some air conditioning. The moment coolness hits him, he sighs in relief. </p><p> </p><p>Feeling finally dried, he takes in the surroundings. It is not a hospital but the walls are a pale shade of white. There are posters hanging on the left side of the lobby and paintings and photographs on the other side placed randomly, just enough to cover a space. A brown leather couch seated beside the reception desk with a wooden table and shelf of magazines. Various green succulent plants resting on it add colors to the minimal design. He walks in the direction of the framed posters. His sneakers slightly squeak from the friction to the tiled floor. The soft hum of the centralized air conditioner being the other sound playing. It’s a deserted place at the moment. Hyunjin turns his head to see if the door has the closed sign-on. However, he’s certain that he saw the exhibit hours outside and Sunday was definitely in it. </p><p> </p><p>The first poster is a painting exhibit located on the ground floor. A stroke of paint in a rainbow gradient from indigo to red brushed across the frame. The second one is a sculpture show also located on the same floor. At a glance, Hyunjin knows it’s not his type. It’s horror-themed. He quickly walks away and proceeds to the main poster, probably the main show. He pauses longer on this one. The exhibit is titled 'monochrome'. Then a short inscription on the far right side reads: <em> find me</em>. Quite an intriguing caption. The exhibit is located on the second floor. It is a photography display. Hyunjin smiles. He was hoping to see one when he thought of coming today.</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Photographer: Unknown</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Exhibit by: Kim Seungmin</b>
</p><p> </p><p>Two eyebrows abruptly meet, Hyunjin alters into a frown. He’s an avid fan of Kim Seungmin. How come he's never heard of this? Maybe he just missed it, he's been busy the past days anyway. He sets a mental reminder to check it out later. </p><p> </p><p>After taking a look at the posters, he strides to the front desk, with heavy and slow steps. He dislikes talking to people, especially strangers. It has always been a challenge for him since he began his university life – from government ID registrations to inquiring at real estate agencies to enrolling himself in college. He had to live alone. Friends he’d gotten close in high school chose campus’ far from his. He had to start from zero. It took him almost a year to get close to his present course-mates and friends in other colleges. In fact, his best friend now is from another college just a year ahead of him. Quite a funny story reserved for some other time. For now, he has to put on a mask, the face of courage he always wears whenever set in this kind of situation. </p><p> </p><p>“Good afternoon, Sir. How may I help you?” A greeting welcomes him. </p><p> </p><p>“Ah, yes. W-well—” Hyunjin stutters, finding the right words to say next, distracted by the intimidating gaze behind the cat-eye-framed glasses of the woman before him dressed in a white suit patterned with stripes. Her curled blonde hair shining under the lights. “Uh—,” he trails off. </p><p> </p><p>The gallery attendant stares at him, raising an eyebrow, waiting. Then, “It's okay. Take your time.” She smiles. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin somehow feels calmer hearing that and seeing the change of look from the woman, his shoulders feel less tense now. After some time and deep breathing, he starts again, “Well, my friend's mom works here. And my friend told me I can just come here and his mom can help me.” </p><p> </p><p>“Do you have the name?” Hyunjin can hear the patience and soft tone in the woman's voice and he hopes his friend's mom will be the same. He's been friends with Changbin for a year but he never really met his parents once despite them also living in the city. Changbin’s mom is a curator at the said gallery and hosts auctions from time to time for different orphanages, hospices, and homes for the aged. His dad is a director at one of the prestigious hospitals in town and had contributed to the implementation of a health bill that helped those who can't afford expensive surgeries. Hyunjin always diligently listens to his friend when he talks about how proud he is to be the son of his parents. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin takes out his phone and opens the message. He shows it to the receptionist. “Ah, Mrs. Seo! So you must be Mr. Hwang Hyunjin.” The woman's face lit up in front of him. Hyunjin can't help but smile along with her and nods. Just right then, he notices the aluminum nameplate pinned on the upper left chest of her white suit attire — it reads ‘Solar’. Hyunjin guesses she must be in her late 20s. She’s indeed a beauty but it’s been a long time since he knew his preference is different from most in the population. </p><p> </p><p>Solar hands Hyunjin a brochure and proceeds to say, “Mrs. Seo told me you want to see the exhibits for a school requirement. You should thank her when you meet her. The gallery is quite pricey.” Her voice shifts to a whisper at the last sentence. She chuckles, the muscles at the side of her lips crinkle, and a perfect set of white teeth appears. “And oh, the brochure is about the photography exhibit,” she hands another set of brochures, “Here are for the other exhibits.”</p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin realizes she's a happy, optimistic kind of person contrary to his first impression a while ago. “Thank you so much. Can I ask what time Mrs. Seo will arrive if ever she comes here?” Hyunjin asks, feeling comfortable talking already. “About an hour from now? Maybe after you explore the gallery, she will be here by then.” She says rummaging through her papers. “Enjoy the exhibit. And also, no pictures allowed. Check the brochure and the website for it. Thank you so much.” She looks at Hyunjin, a smile never leaving her lips. He smiles back and speaks his gratitude once more. Deciding to explore the 2nd floor first, he proceeds to the staircase not once glancing at the brochure. Rather he folds it just enough to fit in his jeans pocket. He doesn't want to be spoiled on what could possibly lie ahead.</p><p> </p><p>××× </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin doesn't hear the clicking sound of stilettos hitting the tiled floor as the curator approaches him with a concerned face. </p><p> </p><p>“What's wrong, Hyunjin?” A woman's voice echoes the vast space of the enclosed room. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin steps back, hands shaking and beads of sweat forming on his forehead, goosebumps visible on his pale white skin. He faces the woman not even registering who she is. </p><p> </p><p>“I—,” he starts but can't bring himself to continue. </p><p> </p><p>“You look like you've just seen a ghost,” the woman chuckles attempting to lighten up his mood. She wonders then what caused him to look like that. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin shakes his head, shaking his thoughts along with it. “I'm sorry. I’m not sure what came over me” He manages to smile. “You must be Changbin's mom.” He slightly bows and extends his right arm. Mrs. Seo takes it, placing her left hand on Hyunjin's arm. </p><p> </p><p>“You okay now?” Giving it a squeeze. Hyunjin isn't but nods anyway. Mrs. Seo guides him downstairs and has him seated on the lobby's leather couch. She leaves for a second, returning with a glass of water in hand. “Tell me now. What's wrong? Did something happen to you upstairs?” </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin takes the glass of water and drinks, taking the time to organize his thoughts. </p><p> </p><p><em> Did you notice something about those photos? </em> “Are those photos, um...” Hyunjin clears his throat. “... old? Are they real? Not just some kind of... filter.” Mrs. Seo begins to smile, understanding what is happening or she thinks so. “You didn't read the brochure, correct?” </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin nods, more confused than ever.</p><p> </p><p>“Those photos are 50 years old. It is a collection of the Kim family, famous for their legacy in photography. It seems that Mrs. Kim,” Mrs. Seo pauses, “I bet you know Kim Seungmin? He's very popular in the field.” </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin nods. “Well, he is Mrs. Kim's grandson. He came to me one day and showed me this set of pictures which are at one take looks like ordinary photos but when he pitched to me the theme and respective captions, I was convinced. It’s a mystery waiting to be solved,” she explains, not quite answering the question in Hyunjin’s mind but giddiness obvious in her tone. “Oh well, it’s in the brochure if you want to know more.” </p><p> </p><p>“You were overwhelmed back there, right? They're really great shots. I also had goosebumps the first time I saw them...” Mrs. Seo continues her blabber about first impressions but Hyunjin already muted her out. His head echoes 50 years. <em> That's decades. Nobody ever noticed something weird about it? Upon seeing me? Or it's just me seeing things. What is going on??  </em></p><p> </p><p>He feels a hand on his shoulder, suddenly snapping from his thoughts. “You okay?” He hears Mrs. Seo asks. </p><p> </p><p>“I'm sorry I drifted again. You were saying, Ma'am?” Mrs. Seo seems not to be affected by Hyunjin's lost facial expression because she's still on cloud nine over the photographs. “It's amazing how Mrs. Kim kept those gems for decades. It's a shame she never knew the photographer. And I hope you enjoyed the tour today.” Mrs. Seo finishes, red lips curving into a smile. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin nods and forces a grin. “Yes, they were great shots. And I did. Thank you so much, Mrs. Seo.” </p><p> </p><p>“Well, look at the time. You should go now before it gets darker.” Mrs. Seo stands up straightening her knee-length pencil skirt. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin is not a kid anymore. His apartment doesn't have a curfew but he slightly bows, utters his gratitude for the nth time, and runs for the door, wanting to escape. He is beginning to feel claustrophobic. </p><p> </p><p>He closes the door behind him. When his eyes finally adjust to his surroundings, the sky is a gradient of dark blue to the softest blue he has ever seen. Street lights glow like twinkling stars. It is beautiful and at peace contrary to what he is feeling at the moment. </p><p> </p><p>With a heavy sigh, as if he has been holding his breath all this time, he finally manages to let it out, “Why in the world was I in those photos that were taken decades ago? Decades...If it’s not me. Who in the world was it? ...” He huffs in disbelief. He's never been this scared before. A swish of wind dances around him. His whole body shivers. </p><p> </p><p>He pats his jeans pocket for his phone. Instead, he feels a paper. Hyunjin slides his hand in it and the exhibit brochure falls loose. He picks it up. </p><p> </p><p>××× </p><p> </p><p>“Did he find it?” Solar asks Mrs. Seo as soon as the boy leaves the building. </p><p> </p><p>Mrs. Seo smiles but doesn’t answer. “Should I contact Mr. Kim now?” Solar tries again, phone in hand ready once signaled but Mrs. Seo just walks past her and climbs the stairs. </p><p> </p><p>Solar shrugs and heads back to her desk. She’s seen the exhibit many times before. She has looked at it many times before but never found what was meant to be found. She has also seen that boy’s face and she knew he found it. Whatever it is. </p><p> </p><p><em> Who </em>ever it is. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. the moon during the day</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>1970 Feb 22 </p><p>
  <em>Winter is almost on its end. It is still cold but seeing you today, I somewhat felt warmer. You have that effect, you know. I don't think you realize that. How are you? I wonder which season you prefer. I personally enjoy spring, the way everything is vibrant, awake, and blooming. I especially love the flowers the most. I write here again because I saw you this morning. It seems that I will always have something to tell you but I am a coward who doesn’t have the courage to face you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>    This morning, I was on my way to develop photos I'd taken the day before when I saw you on the curb waiting for a bus. I was scared you might fall and a car would suddenly pass by. Fortunately, you took a step back. It reminded me of the time when I first saw you —on the rooftop of the university library. I was also scared you were thinking of something dangerous. My feet were ready to run. However, like before, you were looking up. Your head slightly tilted to the side. I followed your gaze and once again, I found my sight on the moon in the early hours of the day. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>    The first time I had witnessed it in the library, I had spent the entire time reading books about the moon instead of doing my assignment. It was my first time seeing that and I was quite fascinated by it. The moon belongs to the dark night and catching sight of it in broad daylight brings a phenomenal impression to me. Ah, anything really is possible. The universe is mysterious and wonderful— the power it holds. Imagine if the universe directs our fated paths towards each other. If that is the case, I want to know what favors the universe so it can align the stars for us. It’s not really close to reality, is it? Apologies. I got carried away. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>    Anyways, as I mentioned, I was reading books that time or I pretend to because you were also there but that’s not my point. I read something that really stuck with me. It goes like this. During the day the moon is called a 'children's moon' because it is said that their eyes were sharp enough to pick it out, where the old folks, with fading vision, could not tell it from the clouds. And may I add, even those our age, with bad eyesight, will undeniably miss it as well. The moon can camouflage along with the white clouds. I tried to take off my glasses once and it just blended perfectly. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>    It became a habit to watch the sky and play a game of finding the moon ever since. Of course, it's not always a moon that will pop-out of the sky in the morning or late afternoon, be there whenever I try to find it. I smile whenever I see one though, and remember you. It's as beautiful as it is among the stars at night. The way it glows in the dark and hides in the morning. A bewitching secret waiting patiently to be discovered. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>    It does look like a cloud if you aren’t looking, right? Take me as an example, a person among the crowd. You will never be sharp enough to pick me out. I don't stand out. Just an average human being among the 3.6 billion others. Just so you know though, even if you don't see me, I'll always be in the same place always. Until the day comes when you can finally catch sight of me. This sounds cheesy but my heart still aches at the thought. So many what-ifs running in my head.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>    The impossibility of “us”. I couldn’t go near. So I stayed there. Stood still and grabbed my camera. Placed my eye on the viewfinder. The first thing I saw was you then I slowly moved upward, finding the celestial body in all its beauty. Before I could get a focus on it, I heard your name being called on my left side and I unconsciously shifted my camera from the sky to you. I was a bit too far but I could see that small spot under your eye, move as you smiled. It looked like a scene from a movie and I was craving to capture it. The way people around move in slow motion. The cool breeze fogging the whole setting. And there was you, looking like spring in winter. I couldn't resist, I clicked the button. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>    The bus arrived. You and your friend hopped on it. I made my way to the darkroom to develop what I had captured. Seeing it now, I wish I could show it to you. It's black and white but the colors remain in my memory.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>×××</p><p> </p><p>“Seungmin! Get down here now! Breakfast is ready!” Seungmin jumps from the sudden voice, he hits his head on the roof of the attic. He winces at the pain and massages his head in an attempt to relieve it. When the pain finally subsides, he closes the journal in his hand then safely places it back inside the box. </p><p> </p><p>When he turns around, he almost faints from a heart attack. “Grandma! Please stop doing that!” </p><p> </p><p>“You’re here again.”</p><p> </p><p>“I like it here,” Seungmin says as he slides his hands in his shorts pocket, as if he were a child being scolded. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m not asking again this time. Just eat your breakfast and go to campus.” The old woman walks out of the small space leaving Seungmin to his own thoughts, covering her nose as she goes.</p><p> </p><p>Since no one is allowed in the attic, housemaids don’t reach it. Seungmin always does the honor to clean it as he stays there often, keeping it as ventilated as he can.</p><p> </p><p>“For goodness sake, renovate this place if you want to live here,” Grandma Kim’s voice echoes as she walks down the flight of stairs. </p><p>    </p><p>“That’s a good idea, grandma! You’re not giving me answers this time either!” He exclaims as he picks up his bag. Spotting dust stains, he huffs a groan. “It’s okay. I’ll reassemble this place nicely. And find those answers myself.” </p><p> </p><p>×××</p><p> </p><p>It's 7 am, Hyunjin is sitting under the bus stop shed scrolling on his phone. He's not waiting for the bus though. A car honks. Hyunjin's head automatically moves from his phone to the road hoping it's what he's waiting for. He frowns at the sight of a stranger in the driver's seat. </p><p> </p><p>Changbin is 15 minutes late. Hyunjin opens his contacts, finds Changbin's name then hits call. Changbin answers on the third ring. “I'm on my way.” Then hang up. Changbin always does this. Answering calls and ending it exactly after he’s done. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin rolls his eyes because he knows Changbin was on the phone with his boyfriend last night. And that is the reason he woke up late. He's happy for Changbin though. Catching Changbin's smile brings a smile to his face as well. That guy has deserved happiness for so long, finally he got it. </p><p> </p><p>Summer is not bad in the morning. There's a cool breeze. Not many people cramp the streets yet. The sun has not fully awakened, he thinks. A sudden thought hits him with that in mind. He looks up to the sky and there it is. The moon during the day. </p><p> </p><p>It's in the same phase as the image he saw in the gallery. A gibbous moon. He stares at it as if a face will appear and tell him the answers to his long list of questions. Instead, he sees the face of the one in the picture. And he can’t stop thinking why that person looks so happy. The more Hyunjin wants to know who it was, the more he wants to know what happened when it was taken. He knows they weren't staged. Every frame seemed like stolen shots.</p><p> </p><p>“What are ya looking at?” </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin jumps at the sudden voice beside him. He turns to his right, lowering his head, sees Changbin standing there looking up to what he's been watching, casually sipping his iced americano, the other hand holding another cup of coffee. Hyunjin smiles at the thought it must be for him. “How long have you been there?” Hyunjin asks. </p><p> </p><p>“I called you but you didn't hear. I even bought coffee. When I came back, you're still staring at it. You okay, man?” Changbin places a hand on Hyunjin's shoulder, face frowning in concern. </p><p> </p><p>“You really look like your Mom. She gave me that look yesterday too.” </p><p> </p><p>“People do say that a lot,” Changbin says smiling. </p><p> </p><p>“Okay, you can give me my coffee now.”</p><p> </p><p>“Catch me if you can!” Changbin hurriedly walks to the car parked at the corner of the street, laughing. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin can't help it. He follows, shaking his head smiling. </p><p> </p><p>Changbin is an allied sciences student while Hyunjin is a business major. They both have 7:30 am classes every Monday so it's been their thing to go to the university together. The ride is just 15 minutes so they arrive just in time for their 7:30 am class. </p><p> </p><p>“See you later, Binnie,” Hyunjin says while unbuckling his seat belt. “And oh, I need to talk to you about something later. I'll send you an address. Let's eat lunch there.” </p><p> </p><p>“But—” “No buts. I know you have a date with Felix but please give me this day.”</p><p> </p><p>“Can I bring Lix then?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, sure.” Hyunjin opens the car door, closes it behind him, then runs for his life until he reaches the third floor. </p><p> </p><p>××× </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin raises his hand to wave at Changbin who just entered the restaurant. Changbin nods at him then proceeds to where Hyunjin is seated. </p><p> </p><p>District Nine is a restaurant just walking distance outside the university. It serves one of the best kimchi stews in the area with a wide variety of main and side dishes on the menu. </p><p> </p><p>“This better be good, Hyunjin. I'm sacrificing my date time for you because you're my best friend. I don't want to say you owe me one. But let's say you do and treating me here is a good way to pay me back,” Changbin says as he slides beside Hyunjin. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin just smiles. He knows Changbin always makes time for his friends while managing his love life on the other hand and he can never say no to District Nine's Korean pancake. “Let's order first. Felix messaged me he's going to be late and said that you decide for him.” </p><p> </p><p>After the waitress leaves, Changbin doesn't want to beat around the bush. He wants it straight out. “You've been acting weird. Now, spill it.” </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin scoots at the far end of the sofa seat, faces Changbin then proceeds to say what he practiced and scripted last night, “First of all, thank you for the free exhibit. Your mom is so kind. She does look intimidating but the moment she talked to me, she really is sweet after all. Second, I need more references for my paper and one exhibit there caught my attention. Can I ask for another favor? I need to talk one on one with Kim Seungmin. Would your Mom be able to ask Seungmin to spare some of his time to meet me or share his contact details?” Hyunjin didn't breathe during the whole duration of his monologue and is currently catching air.</p><p> </p><p>Changbin stares at him still processing what he just said. He’s a good rapper as his hobby but that was a lot to take in. Of course, Hyunjin can always ask him any favor but what exhibit was it that his friend had to set up this lunch. He knows who this Kim Seungmin is because he is famous but what does this have to do with that photographer? He needs more explanation than this. He wants to help Hyunjin as much as he can but he needs to trust him and tell him whatever is needed so he will know what to do exactly. </p><p> </p><p>“Did I hear Kim Seungmin?” Hyunjin and Changbin turn their heads at the same time. Felix is all wide smiles walking the aisle. </p><p> </p><p>His freckles glistening as a ray of noon light hits them. The two boys' eyes watch him take a seat on the other side of the table, in front of them. “So, Kim Seungmin?” Felix's eyes gape at them both, more like a pleading emoji waiting for a response, oblivious to what transpired before he walked in. Hyunjin doesn’t mind though. </p><p> </p><p>“Right,” Changbin speaks first, realizing something, “Isn't he your childhood friend, Lix? The popular photographer.” </p><p> </p><p>Just then, their order arrives. Felix drooling over the burning hot kimchi jjigae. Hyunjin takes his service of tteokbokki. Changbin eyes the kimchi fried rice and hotteok as the waiter places it in front of him. Another waiter arrives with the side dishes and beverages. </p><p> </p><p>“Lemme eat first. I'm hungry. I can't believe Prof. Park extended the class by an hour,” Felix says exasperated, rolls his eyes as he grabs a pair of chopsticks. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin also cannot believe it. The answer is closer than he thinks. Relief washes over him when he realizes Felix knows Kim Seungmin. It will be easy for him to set them up. He doesn't need to waste Mrs. Seo's time. He feels shy already. He knows Mrs. Seo is a busy woman. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin eats his food, finally tasting it, the spice bearable. He's one step closer to the answer. The faster he can solve this, the faster everything will go back to normal. </p><p> </p><p>The three of them eat quietly. Hunger is taking control of their mouths. Felix finishes his meal first. After taking one last sip from his bottled yogurt, he continues the conversation. “Kim Seungmin is my childhood friend as Bin has said,” he pauses to glance at Changbin with a flirtatious smirk. Hyunjin resists rolling his eyes. </p><p> </p><p>“We were neighbors until 6th grade when they moved out. We came back to speaking terms when we encountered each other again in high school but it's never the same as before. We both have separate groups of friends but we still talk from time to time. So what do you want with Seungmin?” </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin has practiced what he will say during the time he was eating so he blurts it out easily, “I want to meet him. He has an exhibit in Clé and I want to write more about it.” </p><p> </p><p>Felix's face once again brightens up. “You've come to the right person! It's hard for people to approach him. He doesn't meet people he doesn't know but since you know me, I can guarantee he will agree to meet you.” Felix extends his hands to reach Hyunjin's on the other side of the table. Wrapping them in his, he finishes, “You can trust me. Leave it to me.” </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin can see the freckles closely and for a moment he is mesmerized. He almost connects the dots like constellations until he hears Changbin clears his throat beside him. They both turn to see a blank-faced Changbin. “Are you both having fun?”</p><p> </p><p>Felix goes back to his seat then laughs heartily looking at Changbin's frowning face but later Changbin joins Felix in a fitful of laughter as if they just exchanged an inside joke of some sort.</p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin watches them both, always amused at their ways of teasing each other. They continue for a long while. </p><p> </p><p>Hyunjin smiles at them and feels relieved that he manages to accomplish what he ought to achieve today. Tomorrow will be another day. </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. crescent suns</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>1970 March 25 </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I'm here again tonight. I'm still wearing what I wore the whole day this very moment as I sit at my desk because I cannot wait to share with you what happened today. Well, what happened to us. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I woke up quite late but I still insisted on eating breakfast this morning. For some reason, I was feeling really hungry at that time. I usually don’t eat breakfast. Especially when I’m already running late. However, I felt at ease this morning. I was even tuning in to the radio. There was going to be a solar eclipse, it said. Was that a sign? So far, my day was doing well. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Believe it or not! It was really going well. I was late but the professor arrived a bit later. I was saved! Sadly, it didn’t last long because one of our professors extended his period. Two hours. I was so depleted I just wanted to sleep. Since my next class was still at 6, I planned to take a nap at the library so I headed there taking a shortcut at the big field. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Spring just began. The field is green, the trees are alive with random flowers blooming around campus giving more life to the already busy place. The sun was out and at 3 pm, it's as bright as Michael Jackson’s future. I decided to walk in the corners of the field for some shade. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I was really out of myself. I didn't know what was happening around me. My mind screaming a lullaby to sleep, I didn't hear you. The moment I snapped myself out, I somehow managed to comprehend what you just said. “You're one of the campus photographers, right?” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I slapped myself in my mind. The way this was happening. I must be dreaming already. When did you appear before me? I must have looked like a fish opening and closing my mouth, finding for words, or even just one word to say. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“It's you, right?” You asked again. I should have asked how you know me. Now that I think of it, I have so much that I should have said but I got tongue-tied. I didn't know I was slowly nodding my head. You walked closer to me until I felt your hand on my shoulder. You crouched slightly so we could be eye level. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Would you mind? Taking a picture of me right now? While the solar eclipse is still going on?” You said, pointing at my camera. My camera is always hanging around my neck so it wasn't a problem. The problem was I froze! I counted 5 seconds until I could finally hear my surroundings. I looked around and everyone was hyped by the eclipse. The whole field was slowly dimming. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I watched you lie on your back on the trimmed grassy field, under one of the big trees around. Your right arm was behind your head as a pillow. You looked up at me grinning like a child, pointed at your chest, and said, “Look!” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe it was because I was still processing what was happening or overwhelmed by the interaction that I only noticed it when you pointed it out. You were covered by the shadows of the tree leaves, rays of sunlight in crescent shapes. You were painted by these small crescent suns. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Step back farther and capture the whole field! I'll be here,” you said. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>There's that smile again. Your eyes disappear into a curve. I followed your order but did not back further. I grabbed my camera and placed my eye on the viewfinder. Groups of college students scatter around the whole field. I saw some of my seniors in the photography club with their special equipment readily grasping the phenomenon. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>And there was me, in my camera, seeing only you. You were nonchalantly lying there, pulling up your free hand as if you can touch the moving lights. I clicked the capture button. When you saw me holding down my camera, you immediately sat up then stood up, walked towards me still covered by those shadows like glitters. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Thanks for that. I hope to see those in the yearbook,” you said when you reached me, then walked past me. I was left there standing for a while until the eclipse ended. When I turned around, you weren't there anymore. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I spent my time in the library reading about eclipses, losing the main reason why I headed there in the first place. And did you know? There are many contacts before totality and back to normal unfolds? I'll consider what happened to us today as the first contact wherein the moon takes a first bite of the sun commencing a partial eclipse phase. This is our beginning. And I am deeply hoping for more contact with you in the coming days, if that's possible. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Tomorrow, I'll go to the darkroom again. I want to apologize in advance though. You won't be able to see this in the yearbook. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>××× </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin locks his phone when he sees a person standing over him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin's next schedule is still an hour from now. He decided to have his break time in the field. Using his knapsack, he comfortably laid on the trimmed grass. He opened his phone’s gallery to send in an email. Just then he saw the pictures he took last night in the attic. He started reading until this unknown stranger decided to be a creep. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Annoyed by the disruption, Seungmin sits up ready to attack whoever this is. At the corner of his eyes, he sees the person move to sit beside him. What the fuck? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When his eyes finally adjust to the light, Seungmin turns his head to face the intruder, his facial expression shifting from a frown to a cheeky grin. “Felix?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>××× </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Would you like to order now, sir?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin turns his head to be greeted by a waitress in a maroon buttoned-up long sleeve shirt, a black apron hanging tight around her hips. A nameplate reads “Moonbyul” in it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Startled by the sudden intrusion, he sits straight then clears his throat. “I'm waiting for someone. Would you mind if you come back when he arrives?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Moonbyul smiles. “Of course.” Hyunjin resumed what he was doing before the waitress appeared, unconsciously bouncing his leg on the floor. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Would you like anything while waiting? Water? Or coffee?” He hears the waitress say, realizing late that she hasn't left yet. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin doesn't want to be annoyed. He's already getting impatient waiting for Seungmin. “A cup of coffee would be nice. Not too bitter, just the right amount of sugar. Thank you.” He attempts to smile but fails miserably. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Waiting for someone? Oh!” Moonbyul claps her hands. “You’re on a date. So that’s why you look jittery. You need a cake! Don’t worry it’s on me...,” she babbles. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin closes his eyes then silently counts until he feels a hand on his shoulder. He opens to see Moonbyul not talking anymore. Her face splashed with concern. “Did I make it worse? I’m so sorry. You must be so tense already and I still blabbered nonsense. Whoever it is you are meeting, it’s going to be okay,” she smiles softly. “You shouldn’t drink coffee at this time. I’ll bring a relaxing drink and a slice of cake. And as I said, it will be on me.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Moonbyul utters another quick apology as she bows then heads for the counter. Hyunjin momentarily forgot why he was anxious. He wants to apologize for making her uncomfortable. He knows she didn’t mean to offend him. When she returns, he makes a quick note to thank and apologize to her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Now that he’s alone and his guest still hasn’t arrived, his leg resumes bouncing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I can sense your anxiety from here.” Hyunjin hears someone say behind him. He ignores it. "Why are you so tense?" The voice getting closer. “Hwang Hyunjin?” A puff of air touches his neck, he slightly jumps from his seat, hastily turning his head to see who it is. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin comes face to face, more like eye to eye with someone. Maybe it's because of the way those eyes stare at him. Or maybe it's just an automatic response when met with an unexpected circumstance. He doesn't move an inch, rather stares at it back as if drowned in it, holding his breath. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The person does the honor to widen the gap. As it slowly moves away, Hyunjin recognizes the face right away. “Kim Seungmin!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin smirks upon seeing the look on Hyunjin's face. “Yep, that's me.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin's eyes follow Seungmin as he takes the seat opposite him. Hyunjin has been anxious that he kept on looking at the details Felix sent him yesterday. Too many questions were running in his head. What if Seungmin doesn't come? Why would he meet someone like me? Is this okay? What if I'll just embarrass myself? Is this really the place? Is this the correct time? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Now that Seungmin's here, Hyunjin can't think anymore. He has seen this young man walk stage after stage. Receiving awards at university competitions— regional, national. And those prestigious awarding-body events. This person in front of him is literally a celebrity. And that person is currently staring at him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Something cold touches Hyunjin’s finger. He flinches snapping him out of his thoughts, breaking the staring game he didn't know they were playing. He suddenly feels shy. More so when he turns to see Moonbyul winking at him as if she helped him. For example, embarrassing himself by drooling over the guy in front of him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’d like to have something like that too but mint chocolate flavor,” Seungmin tells the waitress. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Moonbyul nods, looking at these two beautiful people she thinks are on a date before she heads back to the kitchen. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Turning back to Hyunjin, Seungmin leans his arms in a praying position on the table. “So, how can I help you?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Everything. Everything that Hyunjin rehearsed last night just flushed down the drain. Where should he begin? His concerns abruptly make no sense anymore. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin must have felt Hyunjin's discomfort that he decided to speak for him. “Felix told me you wanted to write about the 'monochrome' exhibit?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin nods. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“My apologies in advance. Those pictures were an old collection of our family. As you've seen in the brochure, it was dated back in the 1970s and sadly the photographer was not documented. It was a personal collection of my great uncle but grandma never  liked it saying it’s mediocre and simple hence I made up a story and created a mystery plot that could invite art enthusiasts.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin already knows that. He has read the brochure more times than anyone ever will. He’s tried to read it many times but nothing seems to answer his questions. If it’s all made up then how come he found it. He believes someone as passionate as Seungmin in his craft would fool people. There’s got to be something. But what if he’s just overreacting. Imagination gone too wrong. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Those were from my great uncle’s college days. He was a university photographer documenting the everyday life of students....” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin tries to listen but something glistening distracts him. He didn't see it a while ago but now that he does, he can't unsee it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>In pictures that Hyunjin has seen online and on social media, Seungmin looks respectful. Someone who can be the class president. But the Seungmin he sees now is quite the opposite. This Seungmin is wearing a black shirt under a red jacket. A silver round collar necklace dangling his neck. And that orbital piercings on his right ear. He looks, well for the right term, hot. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“...Felix told me about your Instagram page where you post your..” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin is currently staring at Seungmin's hair. It looks soft. It covers most of his forehead, fringes falling down smoothly. It’s not all black, traces of purple running from some strands. “Are you done?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That question catches Hyunjin off guard. “Huh?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin laughs. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What's funny?” Hyunjin asks, ignoring the fact that Seungmin caught him checking him out. And that he looks cute when he's laughing like that. “I've been meaning to ask. Were those details enough for your paper? Or were you busy about something else? You can ask me anything or you could watch some more.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin feels his ears burning. He doesn't want to add to his already embarrassing moment. “I think it's enough.” Imagine what Seungmin will think if Hyunjin tells him he saw himself or someone that looks like him in a picture that was taken 50 years ago? He suddenly feels apologetic for wasting Seungmin's time. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“If that is all, I need to go now. I have some other business to do,” Seungmin says preparing to leave. They’re almost at the exit when they hear someone calling them. They turn around to see the waitress from a while ago. She’s holding a tray with Seungmin’s order. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, I almost forgot!” Seungmin exclaims. “Can I have it packed to go? Thank you so much.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course!” They both wait at the entrance. 10 am on a Saturday in summer. The air is warm but bearable. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Where are you off to? I can take you there,” Seungmin says. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I'm going back to my apartment. I can walk from here.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Let's walk for a while then. I left my car there,” he points at the park. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A minute later, Moonbyul walks out with a paper bag. She hands it to Seungmin. “Enjoy your date!” Seungmin laughs as Hyunjin freezes in place. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Moonbyul’s hand flies to her mouth realizing she said it out loud. “I mean day. Enjoy your day.” She bows then hurriedly walks back inside. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t think it’s right to assume things. I’m sorry for putting you in such a situation,” Hyunjin says and bows slightly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s okay. I mean her assumption is correct.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Pardon?” Hyunjin says as he didn’t catch the last part. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing,” Seungmin says back, leaving the café entrance.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They walk silently allowing their surroundings to fill in for them. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin stops beside a black car. Instead of going inside, Seungmin leans on it. He extends his arm, palm up as if catching raindrops. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin stares at it. How the shadows and rays of the tree above them and sunlight dances like glitters on his hands. He remembers the picture in the gallery. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Are there really coincidences? They say we actually have someone we look alike to. If so, do they exist in the same timeline? Or are they a reincarnation? Who was it? Who took it? Was it meant to be like that? Did I really just make it up? Or do I have a reason why I did so? What is the truth?” Seungmin says, staring at his hand, then at Hyunjin. “You still wanna know the answer to those?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin looks at Seungmin dumbfounded, mouth opened. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He knows?</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hop in. I’ll show you something.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. fox rain</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>1970 April 2 </p>
<p>
  <em>I can't stop sneezing right now. What happened today was crazy but I had never laughed this much for a long time. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>This will be very short because I think I'm going to pass out. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>My senior assigned me to take some pictures of the boys playing in the field in the midst of a heavy rain. She thought it would be a great addition to our candid collection. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I grabbed my umbrella and climbed down the stairs. I was stunned to see the sun shining brightly whilst raindrops misting the area. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The rain was thankfully not too thick maybe because the worst had already passed. When I arrived at the side pavement overlooking the big field, boys at a close distance were already wet. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The field was already muddy and yet everyone was still running here and there. I couldn't make out what game it was.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The sun was out. Clouds glow along with it. A rainbow about to form. I positioned my camera, struggling to keep the umbrella from falling in my arm. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Ready to capture the scenery when one of the boys came running after a ball rolling in my direction. The boy looked up and it was you. I was stunned, I pressed the capture button! A habit I didn’t know I already developed. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“Hey, you! Mr. Photographer!” I hear you say as my hand froze, still peeking at the viewfinder. You walked closer to me until I felt the umbrella in my arm slip out. I lowered the camera and came face to face with your beautiful face, under the umbrella you were already holding. “Come play with us,” you say. </em>
</p>
<p><em>And there was me again, frozen in place as you took the strap of the camera off of me then ran to where your belongings were. You returned back running. My concern should be about my camera being stolen but I couldn't think of that as you grabbed my wrist and pulled me to play under a sun shower... And they say you become crazy if you do, how crazier could I become.</em> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>××× </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“The cloud is weeping behind the sun because the fox it loves so much got married to someone else.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin can sense Hyunjin's eyes drilling at the side of his head. The downpour outside is becoming heavy. It's not a normal rain though. It happens once in a while. The sunny day and rain having a collaboration of some sort. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin turns on the radio. “If you look outside, we have a sun shower going on. And you know what that means right? A fox somewhere is sad...” the DJ says. “So here's a song for this occasion. Cry with her. And if you are in the same situation, grieve with her..” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>A melody opens…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin takes a peek at Hyunjin who is looking outside mouthing the lyrics of the song. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>I still don't understand love,</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>so I cannot get any closer.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>But why does my foolish heart keep pounding? </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Let me lie down by your side for a moment.</em>
</p>
<p><em>A moment, just a moment</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“... And that was Fox Rain by Lee Sun Hee. If you are looking for a sign. This is a sign to re-watch the classic drama...” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You know about the story of the fox and the rain?” Seungmin says. He glances to see Hyunjin shrug.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Long ago, villagers wondered why a fox always looked at the sky whenever it rained and the sun was out. They would hear it wailing, wet and crying. The villagers would watch the fox in pain. As time passed by, countless guesses were made. But the one that I will always remember is this. The fox fell in love with a cloud. And the cloud also fell in love with the fox. Both the fox and the cloud knew they can't be together. As an heiress to the throne, the fox had to marry in order to save her kingdom. The cloud, being above all cannot fathom the pain to see his beloved bonded to someone else. The wedding unfolds under the blessing of the sun. Behind it, someone was weeping. No matter how he hid it, the fox knew it was the cloud's tears,” Seungmin pauses to glance at Hyunjin. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don't understand. Why are you telling me this?” Hyunjin's brow furrowed in confusion. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin shrugs. “I want you to know why it's called a fox rain.” And not all love stories end happily ever after.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The rest of the drive is comfortable with the hum of the radio in the background. The rain stops. They both see the rainbow curve in splendor at the now rain-less sky but they both look at it in silence. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>××× </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin fell asleep. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He wakes up at the sound of Seungmin's voice speaking to a receiver. He looks around and sees they are in front of a huge high gate. Sneaking a look at his watch, he realizes they were traveling more than a half-hour already. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The gate opens with a loud bang of metal moving. A path welcomes them. A road in the middle of a forest. Both sides are draped in trees, high trees. A mansion peeking among them. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Where are we?” Hyunjin asks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s my grandpa’s mansion.” Hyunjin doesn’t ask further questions.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As they arrive near, he sees a gardener pruning the green plants, trimming the fringes that grew over time. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin parks at the allotted parking area. Of course, there's that. There must be a whole building for cars as a garage too. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They both unbuckle their seat belts. “You must be hungry. We can eat first before I take you to The Maze,” Seungmin says opening the car door. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin nods, not even questioning what The Maze is, because he can already hear his stomach growling. He hopes Seungmin doesn't hear that. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin leads the way as Hyunjin follows closely behind. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>As the french doors open, Hyunjin gapes at the sight that welcomes him. Hyunjin can't help but bend his head to get a better view of the crystal chandelier above him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Still engrossed at what he is seeing, Hyunjin doesn't realize he's already walking aimlessly. He stops when he feels a hand wrapped on his wrist abruptly pulling him. “Watch out,” Seungmin says, voice soft, eyeing the table with a vase of flowers on it, standing in the middle of the foyer. Hyunjin follows Seungmin's gaze and sees that he almost bumped into it. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Catching a glimpse of the vase, Hyunjin can already estimate how much it costs. Thank goodness Seungmin saved him. Hyunjin suddenly remembers. He shifts his gaze from the vase to his wrist, which is still being held by Seungmin. Just then, the hand leaves, and a pair of feet starts walking away. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thank you for that, by the way,” Hyunjin catches up behind Seungmin. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>"That's my grandma's favorite vase. It's her equivalent of the Japanese's beckoning cat, a lucky charm of sorts, especially when welcoming patrons," Seungmin explains, glancing at Hyunjin. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They arrive at the dining area, assuming as he sees a long table in the center of it. It can probably cater to 50 people, Hyunjin guesses. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin must have contacted the butler beforehand because there's a food set on it already. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Smell of meat enters their noses. More rumbling from Hyunjin’s tummy. Why didn't they eat when they were at the cafe a while back anyway? He didn't even have a sip of his watermelon shake as well. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mrs. Kim is in her study. Do you want to visit her?” the butler says, appearing out of nowhere. This old mansion must have a lot of secret doors. Maybe even an underground crate.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, it’s fine. I can talk to her later.” Seungmin sits on the first chair from the edge. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin doesn’t question a lot of things today. He just sits opposite Seungmin quietly. The butler leaves. They both eat in silence. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You can ask me anything, you know,” Seungmin speaks first, his voice bouncing in the enclosed hall. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m still sorting my thoughts on that. Everything is quite confusing.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Understood. Hit me up anytime.” Seungmin smiles.“Do you live here too?” Hyunjin asks, a little while after. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No. I live in the city. This is more like the home of the family business. Events are usually held in this mansion. It can also be considered as Grandma’s office. She’s managing everything here. Grandpa is sick. Great uncle is,” he clears his throat. “Someone has to take care of the business and my parents are not in this field so grandma took the responsibility.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin nods to that. “So there’s more facilities here? I assume this is not what you meant to show me. And what’s The Maze?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let's finish the food first. Then I’ll show you. You’ll love it there as much as I do.” </p>
<p>Patience is the key. Hyunjin enjoys his steak while he still can. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>××× </p>
<p>“Stop,” Seungmin suddenly says. Hyunjin abruptly halts on his track, almost bumping Seungmin's back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What is it?” he asks walking beside him, voice slightly trembling for fear that there might be wild animals nearby, ready to jump at them. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Listen closely.” Hyunjin listens, confused as to what he is supposed to be hearing. He looks at Seungmin beside him. Slightly near, just half a foot apart shoulder to shoulder. </p>
<p>Seungmin's side profile displayed before his — eyes closed, and a curve of lips in a gentle smile. Hyunjin can't help but stare a little longer, unaware and under a spell. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I love going here. The first time I went, I was bewitched by the ambient sounds. The birds chirping. The swish of the trees as the winds pass by them as if a couple in a dance. The ripples of water flowing down a stream,” Seungmin says, eyes still closed. Remnants of emotions pass by his beautiful face. “I used to believe this is a new-found world. A kingdom I can claim mine. Various creatures live in harmony. I can be whoever I want to be.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin, understanding, closes his eyes. Now intending to listen closely. A smile passes by his lips. His hair loose in the air moving in every direction. A dance of wind. Whispers from a distance. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>A twig of tree branch snaps. He somehow remembers an old film he used to watch when he was a child. The boy and girl climb up a tall tree overlooking their ‘kingdom’. This feels indeed like a new world. He doesn't want to let Seungmin know this though. There's something in him that wants to tease the other guy. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“This doesn't suit you,” Hyunjin says matter-of-factly. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why not?” Seungmin opens his eyes, frowning as he faces the former. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin meets his eyes. Pauses. Then sprints away. “You're not a charming prince! I mean, look at you. You can only be a villain!” Hyunjin's cackle resonates in the wild as he runs to nowhere. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin follows suit. “What did you say? I swear. Don’t let me catch you. You are so d-.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Unbeknown to them, an old woman is watching over the mansion window. She chuckles at the sight. Two boys running and laughing like children in the deep forest. She glances at the framed picture above the end table beside her. “Oh, Seungmin. Your namesake,” she looks back outside the window. The boys disappear among the trees. “He does not only have your name. He also has the same fate as you.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>××× </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Two boys stop on their tracks, bending over, hands on knees catching breath. The forest behind them, losing their laughters, continues its soft hum. Hyunjin plops on the sea of grass as his remaining energy collapses down with him in sheer exhaustion. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin turns around to see him. He walks to his side and unhurriedly joins him on the ground. Their breaths slowly recover from the adrenaline, competing up and down. They both squint their eyes as they look up the sky at the same time, not that they are aware of. Clouds spread like cotton balls in the blue sky. No hint of what is about to come. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>As if the wind carries their voices, they remember all the insults and innocent jokes they threw each other as they ran and ran among the trees, laughing like children on a playground. “I hope I didn't offend you back there.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin turns his head to see Seungmin watching him. He blinks. Taken aback, hastily looks back to the safe gaze of the sky above him, no matter how the glints hurt his eyes. It's better than to be burned by the intense eyes of the person beside him. Why is he staring at me? What is he thinking about? He sees a movement in his peripheral view. The wind blows softly. A moment later he realizes it's not the wind rather Seungmin breathing beside him. He's too close, his nose almost, almost touching his ears. At the thought, Hyunjin knows it's now painted pink. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Is he still gazing at me? Is he about to whisper something to me? What is this situation? A little panicked is an understatement but somewhat thankful they are in the middle of nowhere. Hyunjin holds his breath. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Afraid to say something, he gathers all his lasting energy to roll himself a little away but instead faces Seungmin in the process. A panicked gasp escaped his lips. Relieved to see the other guy's eyes closed, he waits for a good 5 seconds before he slides himself farther away observing intently if that pair of eyes will open, moving slowly so as to not wake him up. After some more adjustment for a comfortable position, he settles using his arm as an alternative pillow.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There's something about people when they’re sleeping. Despite not being sure if the boy before him is really asleep or just closing his eyes to escape this circumstance, he doesn't care. He won't admit it but he's relishing this moment. This boy in front of him. He looks tough with all the accessories. But as he lays down here, Hyunjin can't help but giggle at how squishy and cute he is. He remembers the lyrics of the song in the car awhile ago. He begins to hum it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>(I still don't understand love,</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>so I cannot get any closer.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>But why does my foolish heart keep pounding? </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Let me lie down by your side for a moment.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>A moment, just a moment..)</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>×××</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Something drops on Seungmin's cheek. His nose wrinkling when another touches his face again. Then suddenly, a downpour onsets. He woke up instantly. For some reason, avoiding Hyunjin’s eyes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They both hurriedly get up, arms covering their heads as if that will somehow stop the rain from hitting them. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seungmin grabs Hyunjin's hand and guides him where to go. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>×××</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The old man who was pruning the garden a while ago stares in awe at the sight he is seeing. Those two boys are shining under a sunny sky, twinkling as the light reflects in the raindrops. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He was about to run to give his umbrella to the young master but did otherwise. He walks back to the forest, a sense of Deja Vu hitting him. He’s seen this scenery before. A long long time ago when he was just a new house boy of the family.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The gardener, like he did those years ago, gazes at the sky and prayed softly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Whatever fate this rain had, whatever fate the past had, don't pass it to these boys. For once, let one love story end in happily ever after.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. maze of memories</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>1970 August 3 </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>If you ask people when they first met their friends, they would probably give you a frown upon realizing they don’t know. In my case, I had it recorded. When I met them, I was unaware it was already written in the stars. I have no one to thank but you. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>That day under the rain will forever be etched in my stone of memorable days. I thought it was gonna be the only one like it in my life. The next day. I was surprised that you and your friends invited me for lunch. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Your friends were really considerate. They know I am timid. They never let me feel out of place. And I probably saw you smile on your own. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Today marks the 4th month since that day. And the first day of the 2nd semester. Those two weeks of break were so fun. I had invited you all to our vacation house. Such a sight to see your awestruck faces upon seeing the place. Sadly, the other boys had to go to catch a bus to their hometowns and we were left alone. We played like kids in the forest and when we arrived at the fields, it started to rain. I only realized later that I had grabbed your hand and pulled you forward until the rain stopped. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>There was a vacant lot there and I had told you about my dreams for that space. I wanted to build my own art gallery there where I can have my own exhibits of my personal life. When I grow up, I will tell my sister’s children about it, tour them as I teach them about why the design is like that. I wanted it to be like a maze. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>And just today I received your mail. It was the sketch of my maze of memories. Detailed with descriptions of everything I told you. How did you remember all of it? How could you pay attention when I myself was losing my head because finally I could tell you all those things. Personally. Face to face. However, there are still words left unsaid and I still resume writing here in my journal of unsent thoughts. I promise to tell you later on. For now, baby steps. Slowly. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Tomorrow, I will also send you a maze. The line for enrollment today was pretty much like a human labyrinth. I took a picture for the yearbook. I’ll give you a copy. Spot yourself in it if you can. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>××× </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The rain has stopped as if it never poured at all. Hyunjin pulls his arm forward. Palm up, checks if the raindrops really halted. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Keys rattle behind him and he turns around. “Welcome to The Maze,” Seungmin’s lips curves in an awkward smile, like those promoters of products. “Well, it’s actually called the maze of memories but ‘The Maze’, his hands gestures the quotation, “sounds more appropriate especially to a structure like this.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin’s head suddenly spins. “Maze of memories? Isn’t that the name of one of the pictures in the gallery?” he trails off. “How did you actually name all of those?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Storytelling is for the latter part of the tour,” Seungmin beckons Hyunjin to come in as he finally finds the key. The hinges screech as the high mahogany double door opens. Seungmin enters. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Something tells Hyunjin this is a bad idea. For one, he doesn’t like going into closed spaces. More so in the middle of nowhere, with someone he just met. On the other hand, answers are just a door away. To make this trip worth it, he has to take a risk. Even if there’s a possibility the one he’s crushing on since he first saw him in a magazine could turn out to be a serial murderer and inviting them to a home-based art gallery is his modus. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin’s head snaps towards the voice. “You’re not what?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know what you’re thinking.” Seungmin shrugs. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Silence. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not that kind of person. And for your information, there’s CCTV in every corner of this building,” Seungmin says walking back inside. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin sighs defeated. “Okay then.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It’s empty. No big old jars. No chandelier. No floral arrangements. Just a huge high glass wall overlooking what’s inside. Staircase base at each side of this empty, beige lobby.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What may seem empty at the outside, doesn’t always mean it’s empty inside too. Most of the time, they have the most. Whatever they lack in appearance, they recover in their fullness of creativeness, ideals, good conduct, and kindness, that’s what my great-uncle said to me when I was still a mere 12 years old boy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I had no idea what he was talking back then. He told me I still have a long way in life. It took me 7 years to realize what he ought me to address.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin walks up the flight of stairs. Hyunjin follows, mouth zipped, eyes roaming everywhere. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It will get dark along your journey especially on the way up so never forget to turn on the lights. Great-uncle also said that.” Seungmin presses the switch. Small lights turn on but instead on the middle wall, they all form up at the bottom lining the staircase like those in the cinemas. Tiny light bulbs illuminating a warm shade of light. “Always be good even if you feel darkness is looming over you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin looks up to see Seungmin already at the top floor, looking down at him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The staircase is carpeted. No matter how fast he ascends, nothing echoes. He reaches the top and his mouth meagerly falls open. The entrance was underwhelming. However, this place is beyond modest. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin pokes Hyunjin’s chest. “This is where the beauty lies, dear son. There’s a whole paradise within you. No riches in this world can ever replace.” His voice matching that of an old man’s. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin steps back, just enough for Seungmin’s finger to leave his fast-beating heart. He walks to the railings for a better view instead. Seungmin walks beside him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Maze of Memories or The Maze as the locals call it is a mausoleum-type structure. Modern architectural columns stand firm on the exterior. Hi-end custom made stained leaded glass makes up the ceiling, reflecting the skylights. And a crystal chandelier hangs on it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Different interior abstract sculptures line the hallway with framed photographs in between. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin walks upon them. Looking intently.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Those are my great great grandparents. Great uncle restored them. Everything that is on this floor belongs to the generation before my grandparents. They are strangers to me so I don’t look often. It creeps me out,” Seungmin shudders. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So, what’s the story of that?” Hyunjin points to the maze below. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“15 years ago, my great uncle found a sketch with descriptions in it. He was fascinated. With no mark as to who owns it, he claimed it as his own since he found it in his study room. He asked grandma about it but she also didn’t have a clue where it came from. They consulted an architect to see if the said design was patented and turns out it’s not. 3 years later, construction began. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What baffles great uncle was that whoever made it knows about the vacant lot in the forest. He just shrugged it off and said if someone claims it then might as well pay. So here it is.” Seungmin gestures his hands referring to the whole place. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They commence their walk.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“As the name suggests, there’s indeed a maze in here. Those walls below are full of memories. Pictures from childhood, school days, family vacations, etc are all framed there. Great uncle told me once about perspective. If you look at one person without knowing about them, it is easy to judge. If we look at one situation only closely, we won’t be able to know that a bird’s eye, there’s actually good parts. That is somehow the logic of the maze. From up here, you have the view in general. Once there, you’ll be able to understand the details. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“In life, you have to be at both sides to understand and to avoid misjudging someone or a situation,” Seungmin finishes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They finally arrive at the edge with another staircase. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Any questions?” Hyunjin stays silent. “From here onwards, I will be telling you a story. And you have to pay attention,” Seungmin says with all seriousness in his tone. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re scaring me,” Hyunjin says, hands-on the railings for support. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They descend the stairs quietly. “Have I told you?” Seungmin suddenly turns around. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin almost trips from his step. “The what?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin looks up to him and says, “I have the same name as my great uncle, the owner of this place.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>For some reason, Hyunjin’s hair on his arms rose up. “What’s that got to do with me?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’ll know soon.” They resume their descent. It has a height of 7 feet. Seungmin guides Hyunjin on which way to go. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You have it memorized?” Hyunjin asks. “I’ve been going here from time to time. I study the structure from there,”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin points up at the balcony of the 2nd floor. I also remember the photos as I pass by. Do you want a whole tour?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin is quick to say no. It’s becoming claustrophobic. He looks at the pictures with interest to distract himself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The pictures are old but obviously restored solely to be displayed here. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Every frame is a remnant of a memory, a story to tell. Some are still shots while most are taken in the midst of an action.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Is this you?” Hyunjin asks as he spots a picture of a boy sleeping on someone’s lap with a toy on his hand. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No. That’s my great uncle. The time frame of the pictures here ended in the 1990s which was before I was born.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“This looks exactly like you though.” Seungmin clears his throat. “Let’s move on.” “Your great uncle has a natural talent. These captures are amazing.” Hyunjin says as he scans the walls. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finally reaching the end, the glass wall from a while ago now visible again but this time they are on the other side. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey! You told me you are not here. Then who’s this?” Hyunjin exclaims as he sees a wall with close up pictures of Seungmin, smiling not at the camera but at the one taking it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hyunjin...” Seungmin trails off. Silence. “That’s not me.” A wave of nausea hits Hyunjin in a flash realizing what it could mean.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Great uncle Seungmin disappeared five years ago. Before he went missing, these set of photos were still not here. I didn’t want to assume at first but I just knew these pictures triggered something in him. We have almost no one to ask where he could be as he’s been a loner and no friends to go to. We hired private investigators. Used our connections to force authorities to find him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Three years passed and we still couldn’t find him. Grandma said we have to give up but I can’t. There’s something not adding up. I asked Grandma to help me and tell me where great uncle’s things are. I was surprised she pointed me to the attic and there I saw the journal. Entries with no clues who was who. I rummaged through all the boxes and finally, I found the pictures written in the journal. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How did I find that one person in all of them? I referenced it all to the diary entries and I was scared it fits the descriptions perfectly. There was no name, just a face. How in the world will I find this person that could possibly have the answer to where my great uncle is? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I looked up every year books possible but there’s no face like the person in the pictures. Just then one day I saw you. Maybe you have the answers. I was desperate. But after that one time, I didn’t see you again. I lost you. My hopes were all gone. I had to find you but how. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I decided to exhibit the pictures. I left it to fate that you may see it, giving up my search. I still read the journal from time to time. Maybe I missed something from my previous reads. And here you are.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Sweat trickling Hyunjin’s forehead. His head was tight and ringing. “I can’t. Please get me out of here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin softly whispers an apology as he guides Hyunjin to the emergency exit. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The drive home was silent. Seungmin said what needs to be said. He understands what Hyunjin is going through because he was the same. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They stop in front of Hyunjin’s apartment. The night is cold. Hyunjin hugs himself as he heads for the entrance, not once glancing at Seungmin. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>××× </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not you, Hyunjin. So what is wrong?” Changbin finally says on the other line after Hyunjin told him about everything. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Remember my dreams? I only have vague flashbacks of it after a long time but remember when my therapist told me to write down whatever I can after I wake up? I recall clearly jotting down the word journal.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh please,” Changbin says exasperated. “Don’t over-think this. It’s just a journal.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, I’m opening my notes now and the keywords match.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“When was the last time you had one of these dreams?” Changbin says, the sound of a beer can pop open. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“A week ago.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What’s the word you wrote?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not a word. It’s a name.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh oh.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin stares at the notepad in clean cursive, the name ‘Seungmin’ penned on it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not the Seungmin you just met, right?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t think so.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. lucid dreams</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hyunjin! Hyunjin!” A college boy raised his hand with a piece of paper swaying back and forth to get the attention of another college boy waiting by the bus stop. “Hyunjin! Hyunjin!” He struggled passing through a herd of early commuters. Fleeting, misty clouds escaped his breath the more he screamed. The guitar case around his back bumping passers-by causing looks of annoyance. Some raised their eyebrows as if in wonder what could be the reason why someone is yelling in the early hours of the day.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>The boy by the bus stop glanced at his side upon hearing his name. The side of his eyes crinkled as he beamed into a cheeky smile upon recognizing the face behind the voice.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>The guitar boy reached the bus stop catching air. Hyunjin pats his back to somehow ease his struggle.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>They both heard the bus engine whirring beside them. The hinges made that distinct sound as it opened. They hurriedly hopped inside.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Rush hour was never the best decision to commute. All seats were taken. They held onto the railings as the bus began to roll again.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>“I passed the audition,” Guitar boy waved the paper in his hand which seemed to be a letter. Hyunjin was about to say something along the lines of congrats, you did well but was distracted. He watched a boy outside the bus window walking whilst looking at his camera, grinning ear to ear.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Hyunjin smiled to himself.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>×××</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Pair of eyes slowly open, a hint of annoyance evident. The phone on the bedside table continues ringing. Hyunjin reaches for it, not looking. His hand taps the table until he feels that modern object, still vibrating. He grabs it, squints his eyes to catch a glimpse of whoever is calling him early in the morning. The phone reveals 5:40 am, the light hurting his eyes. He hits the green button.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Apologize,” Hyunjin says directly, voice still hoarse.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright. I am so sorry for waking you up 20 minutes earlier than your alarm clock but Felix had a schedule so early I needed to drive him to the venue and I decided to just see you in person after our conversation last night,” Changbin explains. “Can you open the door? I brought you breakfast.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin's stomach grumbled upon the mention of food. His eyes still want to close and sleep some more but hunger prevails.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Yesterday was exhausting. After the phone call with Changbin last night, he brushed his teeth, changed his clothes, and went to bed right away. The last food he had was from the mansion. Just remembering it made him shudder.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He tucks out the blanket wrapping his body then unhurriedly gets up. The floor is cold as he struggles to find his slippers. He rubs his eyes. After a minute or so, he stands up. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His apartment is small. One bedroom, one restroom, a tiny living room annexed with a kitchen, and a balcony overlooking the neighboring apartment buildings. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The lights are off. Just a night light plugged in at the other side of the room enough for him to see where to walk, though it's been two years already. He can draw the small apartment layout even in his sleep.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What took you so long?” Changbin says the moment the door opens. He hastily enters and turns on the light.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin groans as he covers his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Go take a shower and I'll set up the food,” Changbin ushers Hyunjin to the bathroom.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>×××</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Lix cooked these?” Hyunjin says as he takes a seat at his small dining table.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Changbin nods as he munches a kimbap. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin begins to eat as well. “Hey, Binnie,” he starts, pausing for suspense. Changbin stops chewing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I had a dream,” Hyunjin says.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Let me guess,” Changbin sounds confident. “It's the bus stop.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How did you know that?” Hyunjin furrows his brows.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Changbin shrugs. “I did math. Among your recurring dreams, that's the most you mention.” His chopstick grabs another kimbap.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Since we're on the topic, last night I had some research. It's actually a common occurrence that people see their doppelgangers to some painted or photographed subjects in museums and galleries. It's become quite a trend too. In your case, your lookalike isn't even the subject of the photos. I saw the pictures and if you didn't tell me, I won't even conclude that the person there resembles you. What made you so sure?” Changbin looks at Hyunjin, legitimately curious.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin puts down his chopstick and nonchalantly shrugs.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It's your dreams, right? The setting, place, everything in it looks familiar and as if you knew what exactly happened there but you have no recollection but it seemed as if you have seen it before,” Changbin fills in for him, or just guesses. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You've seen Seungmin in your dreams too even before you've known him but you just forget. Then after you've seen him in that one magazine, you recognize him every time you dream of him. But that picture in the maze questioned you everything. What if it's not the Seungmin you know?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Changbin pauses. “Why are you dreaming of someone else's memories, Hyunjin?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>×××</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Days passed by in a blur. The last day of the semester finally arrived. Hyunjin falls in line to submit his Humanities assignment. He never really saw the other exhibits other than that one which he still can't bring himself to mention and so he had no other choice but to write about it omitting some details of course.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Corridors are packed with excited students. The first semester is finally done. Even though the break is only two weeks, it's still better than not having at all. Hyunjin tiptoes to see a better view of the sea of frantic bodies. He immediately walks to the most uncrowded path, excusing himself as he keeps bumping bodies along the way. Some pat his back enthusiastically, other girls wave at him shyly. Hyunjin isn't that popular but he's got the looks to be glanced about. Always shy whenever given attention, he awkwardly grins back at them.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As if inside a tunnel, the light from the distance lures him. He resumes struggling to move in the crowd, head down, avoiding as much eye contact as possible.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Group of what he assumes to be his classmates are waiting by the elevator. He's really not in the mood to talk to anyone at the moment especially that they seem to be discussing what they submitted.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin resumes his walk, heading to the exit door this time.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Closing the door behind him, he momentarily closes his eyes and releases a sigh of relief. He takes his time descending down the flight of stairs.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>×××</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>There's always something about a campus surrounded by trees. No matter how hot the weather, hiding under the shadows will always save the day or more likely the skin— compare to colleges with just one huge building, facilities squeezed in its vastness. Heat waves visible from other buildings. Of course, there's nothing wrong with it but to be one with nature just brings solace no other piece of comfort can ever provide. On the other hand, the place will never matter if you are surrounded by your favorite people.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin can't quite tell if the person in front of him is one of those favorite people. For one, he feels as if his chest is about to burst because he misses him so much. On the other, he recalls their last encounter, and another bout of nausea hits him tremendously. The next thing he knows, someone is already holding him, supporting his weight as his knees begin to fall.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey,” Seungmin says, “you okay?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin nods, rather passive.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin guides Hyunjin to a stone bench beside a massive tree he doesn't even know the name of. “I have water in my car. Stay here,” Seungmin says before he leaves.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin's head falls to his hands, messing his hair. “What is wrong with me? Why do I always embarrass myself in front of him?” He shakes his head in disbelief. Suddenly, he feels something cold touches his cheek and sees a shadow beside him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What are you murmuring about? Are you that sick?” Seungmin says, touching the back of his palm on Hyunjin's forehead.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin stares at him, pretending to be not bothered by the physical contact. Seungmin's not wearing any accessories this time. His eyes are also bare of any eyeliner. Though the all-black theme doesn't change. Seungmin is wearing a black shirt —no statement, just plain— tucked in his black knee shorts. Black belt. A black running shoes. He only sees it now, he's also holding a black cap. “Isn't it hot?” Hyunjin can't help saying.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Who?” Seungmin says.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin smiles but bit his lip to hide it. “Did you receive my email?” he says, changing the topic.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin sits beside him. “Yes. Is writing your hobby? That was a really long email.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don't really want to see you today. I think I specified that clearly in the email,” Hyunjin says.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We only have two weeks to solve this. I think we need to keep going now. And I want to free you from this. A lot must be going on in your mind. If finding answers will make you better, I will do it right away.” Seungmin says softly, looking at Hyunjin's gaze, moving closer as he goes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That sounded like a declaration of love,” Hyunjin says back, looking away, regretting the moment he blurted it out.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin moves closer. “Was it?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin abruptly stands up. Meeting Seungmin's eyes finally, he says, “Okay now, loverboy.” Emphasis on the last word. “Let's go. The library will close early today.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>×××</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So it started when you were 12 years old? What was the first dream like?” Seungmin asks. His third this time.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I can't remember. But my mom said I was crying so bad. Then it happened again the next day. And the next. My parents were so worried. They kept asking me what I dreamed about but as the day rolled on, I just forgot about it and played like I never woke up crying with a nightmare in the first place,” Hyunjin says, eyeing the students around them. While they both head for the library, others are heading to the main gate, obviously ready to begin their break. He kicks a stone on the ground, as if it's the obstacle that is bugging him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It got better though. How did that happen?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin faces Hyunjin, walking backward.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin shrugs, looking down. “It just happened that way.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What was the first dream like?” Seungmin asks yet again.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I can't remember.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You had a therapist?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin nods. “She told me to write down my dreams the moment I wake up.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So? What was the first dream?” Seungmin is relentless.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin doesn't want to answer that because he really can't remember. “Just a vague memory of someone opening a rooftop door.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin stops on his track. Hyunjin, a second late bumped into him. He quickly moves back, recovering. He eyes Seungmin for his reaction but he's frowning, thinking of something. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey, are you okay?” Hyunjin says, concerned if he has said something wrong.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I haven't told you, have I?” Seungmin says.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“About what?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What's in the journal.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What's in the journal?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Remember the moon during the day?” Seungmin says, resuming his walk. Hyunjin follows.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“There was a mention of a rooftop there,” Seungmin says, eyeing the library building at the distance.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you think these are all connected?” Hyunjin says.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I think,” Seungmin says slowly, pacing his step with each word. “I think the person in your dream is the same person in the pictures who is also the same person in the journal.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And he's someone special to your great uncle,” Hyunjin says what exactly Seungmin is thinking about.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finally, they arrive. “We have two missions to accomplish this semester break. One, find my missing great-uncle. Second, find out what happened to that person in your dream who also happened to be Hyunjin.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They both nod in agreement.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They then ascended the flight of stairs towards the library entrance.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>×××</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So our lead so far is your dream notes. The journal wasn't much of a help. There's no name whatsoever in there,” Seungmin says, exiting the elevator. “Why are we here though?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“As I mentioned in the email. I skimmed and went through my notes. That's how I found out his name was the same as mine. And I remember my parents used to tell me that what if it was my future. I only learned now that it could be the past. As to whether it's </span>
  <em>
    <span>my</span>
  </em>
  <span> past, we are yet to find out.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You really sure guitar boy is this Han Jisung? The HAN for that matter?” Seungmin says, shocked at what he read in the email.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The library is now empty except for the student librarians filing and stacking the remaining books on the tables.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin and Hyunjin quietly pass by shelves after shelves until they reach the farthest.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin scans the space and a familiar memory appears in mind. “I went here before.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin doesn't hear him as he right away proceeds to skim the racks for the year he is searching for.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Looking for this?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin turns to see Seungmin holding a yearbook, showing the year on it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>1972.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin grabs it, then plops it down on the table. He begins to turn page after page, in a hurry. His eyes scanning the pages, specifically scouring for that one name.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin's face frowns, frustrated. He's almost in the middle but the name is still nowhere to be found.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hyunjin.” Seungmin's voice is getting softer. He touches Hyunjin's arms. Hyunjin stiffens.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Their eyes meet. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know where you can find it. Now chill.” Seungmin moves to stand beside him, reaching for the yearbook. “I think I told you before how I went on my own investigating my great-uncle's disappearance. This is one of the places I went to.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He opens a page, slides it to Hyunjin. A monochrome portrait of someone exactly looking like the Seungmin in this library comes face to face with him. “The similarities are so uncanny.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Here,” Seungmin points at something on the page. “Your guy is here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Han Jisung.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“He's not who I was looking for though,” Hyunjin faces Seungmin.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Who then?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hwang Hyunjin.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They spend the next minutes coursing through the pages. And no Hyunjin was found.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That's weird. He's supposed to be here too, right? Why is he not here then? What happened?” Hyunjin says exasperated, head spinning from all the skimming.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We have no choice then. We have to meet Han Jisung. He might know the answer,” Seungmin says.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I searched for it, in case we need it. He's now living in Haeundae district.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We're going to Busan?” A hint of enthusiasm evident on Seungmin's voice. The idea of beaches and salty air appealing to him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Busan? Count us in!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Seungmin and Hyunjin both turn to see Felix standing on the other side, face beaming.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How long were you even there?” Seungmin asks.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A shadow moves behind Felix and Changbin emerges. “Long enough to watch.” He gestures his hands. “This. You two. Doing whatever it is you are doing. With all the seriousness on your faces.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Hyunjin rolls his eyes. “I don't even want to know what you both are doing here. In this empty library.” He mimics Changbin's hand gestures. “Doing whatever you are doing. With all the love on your faces.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Felix and Seungmin share a look then laugh.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We're going to Busan tomorrow. Let's meet at my house for a short run-down of our missions,” Seungmin says, silently putting the yearbook in his bag.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don't know what that is but I'm in,” Felix says then points at Changbin beside him. “He's also in. Let's go!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They all leave the library, walk out of the gates, side by side. Men on a mission.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Sembreak has begun.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reaching here! Please do leave comments and kudos. Let me know what you think. :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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